How to Win Valentine’s Day

If you happen to be one of those people who hates Valentine’s Day, I think it’s because you’re doing it all wrong. I mean, how could a holiday where chocolate and crafting play such critical roles be a bad thing?

Yes, there’s the whole romantic, wooing, expressing-your-love aspect, which is great if you’re lucky like I am and have a sweet beloved to focus on, but which can be depressing if you’re currently single or, worse, stuck in a relationship with someone you can’t stand.

So if you are in hatin’ mode on this day of love, here’s what you do to make that Grinchy heart grow three sizes too big: try to woo yourself.

Buy yourself some fancy chocolates. You could wait till February 15th and get them half off, but I don’t advise it. If you’re like me, you’re going to have to work hard to persuade yourself that you are loved and valued. Gifting yourself with some full-priced, on-time (or even ahead of time) chocolate and some instant gratification will speak volumes and will be a step in the right direction toward slowly winning yourself over.

Next, gather up some supplies and make yourself a valentine. You could bust out the paints and colored pencils if that’s your thing, but you could also partake in the time-honored Valentine’s Day tradition of cut and paste.

valentine

The beauty of collaging is you don’t have to be able to draw or paint and you don’t have to have any expensive supplies on hand. I guarantee you there’s stuff in your house right now that you can cut apart and paste together to make something cool, something you can hang up on the wall to remind yourself of this simple but sometimes difficult to remember fact:

socks

If you’re still stumped for materials, nothing says win/win quite like using the shiny, colorful wrappers from eaten chocolates to create a work of art.

honey badger

You must eat the chocolate first, though. Sorry, it’s mandatory.

As you sit there in your post-collaging glow, gazing upon your creation with a belly full of chocolate, a warm feeling of contentment and well-being will creep into your hater’s heart as you begin to feel, down in your very bones, that you are loved.

peace hawk

So what are you waiting for? Go on and start working on wooing yourself. Because you and I both know how you like to play hard to get. This could very well take more than one box of chocolates.

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